Hey when i join the Skcraft Alice server it runs for about 5 seconds then crashes and take up all my ram. this is not client side because i can run single player just fine. when i try to load skcraft up again it will not open. i have downloaded it twice and so far it has happened everytime on the server.
Your using the launcher right? (just checking), you can consider start up the SKMCLauncher with more ram next time and if that doesn't work, open the console when you startup the luncher go through what you do and tell us what happens. You might need to do something else though because it definitely is client-side because it has nothing to do with running singleplayer.
Not sure what that has to do with this problem, but it is a good idea to keep them updated nevertheless. The default allocated memory is usually more than enough to run minecraft, even with mods (unless it gave you the out of memory screen in which case I am wrong here), so try running Minecraft with the console enabled to see if there are any errors along the way.
In the launcher click "More Options..." and then check the box that says "Launch with console". Then just log in, try to get on the server again and if it doesn't work post the log from the console here.
I had a similar issue with another minecraft install a while back, try re-installing the launcher and the folder for skcraft in appdata (cannot remember what it is called).
The folder of SKCraft is... .minecraft, and the one of Vincent is .skcraftvincent, and the one of Alice is .skcraftalice... You don't need to delete the whole .minecraft folder, just a config file in it, as far as I remember, it is an xml config file.